Monday, July 10, 2006

Death to OC!

As you all know, I live in Orléans, about 15 minutes out of Ottawa. I work in Ottawa and because the traffic is beyond retarded from Orléans to Ottawa, I take the bus. Can yobelieveve that I live 15 minutes out of Ottawa but it would take me AT LEAST 45 minutes by car on a good day and cost me 150$ a month in parking? And lets not forget part of my sanity due to road rage related issues. So to avoid all that BS I take the bus. Its better for the environment, cheaper than driving, the bus driver deals with dumb ass drivers that deserve to be shot, and I can peacefully drink my much needed morning coffee. No brainer right? WRONG!!!! E-V-E-R-Y-D-A-Y I get into work pissed off, or, option B, when I get home at night. Today was definitely, option A.


I had a really rough weekend so I had to drag my fat ass out of bed (even harder to do when my significant other is sleeping soundly next to me). Anyways, after showering and poking my eyeballs out while trying to put in my contacts, I go downstairs to make myself a nice gallon of coffee. Well, well, looka here, there's no fucking milk!!!!! Son of a bitch! Why me? Screw it, I'll drink it without the cow juice and add a cup of sugar to compensate.


While I sip my coffee I look at the time...its 7:21 and my bus passes at 7:23. No need to panic - throw her in high gear and she'll make it, no problem. I grab my milkless coffee, bolt out the door, and I start running (if you can call that running) down my street. As I am running towards the bus stop I can hear the bus coming. So I throw her in super high gear and sprint towards the bus stop, jumping over the street curbs like an Olympic hurdle jumper. After avoiding getting run over by a car, I make it to about 5 feet from the bus doors. Haleluia! I made it, so I keep running towards the doors...OMG NO, NO, the bus is actually f***ing leaving!!!


And so I stood there, looking through the back window, watching the people at my stop taking a seat in the bus like a shit head. It was just like in the movies when a mother's son is going away to school and she watches him looking back at her through the back window of the car...well ok, maybe it wasn't that dramatic, but you get the picture.


I was so PISSSSSSSSSSED!!! I felt the urge to run next to the bus and give the driver the finger. Instead, I took my coffee mug and threw it at the bus. Okay, maybe not, but I wanted to! And what makes me even more angry is that a lady I take the bus with TOLD the driver I was coming, TWICE!! What does he say? She can walk to the corner and take another bus! You asshole!!! So the next morning I have him THE nastiest look.


This happened to me before, when I lived in Vanier (that on is own deserves a post) but that time my foot was literally in mid-air as I was taking a step INTO the bus when the driver closed the doors and left! So I took my cell phone, called OC Crapo, and gave a client service lady HELL! You don't wanna mess with me in the morning. They don't call me 'Grizzly' for nothing motha' suckas'!

And its not just the fact that most drivers are bad ones, but the buses are old (some older than me, yes like 30 years old!), they have NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO air conditioning, and if they do, they don't turn it on (I once told the driver to turn it on and he said it was "broken") so you boil to death in the summer. And the list goes on and on...



So my dilemma is this: should I suck it up or should I start taking my car and possible killing someone? what would you do?

Double D - out






1 comment:

jali said...

Great writing and very funny story Dal!

You sound so much like the Dal I know and love. She's not a blogge though and has no time for this stuff.